I Almost Died

I think I almost had a heart attack this weekend. I was feeling in the mood to cook, which doesn't happen very often (I really enjoy cooking, but my schedule makes it difficult to do so regularly unless I want to eat at 10am or 11pm and I don't really want to do that). So I checked out the Pioneer Woman's Favorites section. 

I decided to make her "Most Favorite Burger Ever."

And because I didn't think that had enough fat in it, I also decided to make her Onion Strings to go along with it

After making these two items, I decided to throw in something "healthy" making my own chopped salad concotion along with some homemade creamy blue cheese dressing.

The problem with this meal wasn't just that it was incredibly fatty and bad for me, it was that I ate it TWO DAYS IN A ROW! I was okay after the first day, but after the second I felt horrible. I never really experience heartburn or indigestion, so when I started feeling chest pain my first thought was "This is it! I'm going to meet Jesus right now. Craig, I love you. Thanks for being a good husband. Oh, and please wake up so I can say goodbye to you." Craig gave me a grunt response. 

Then it dawned on me that maybe this is what heartburn feels like. So I took some Pepto-Bisol, sat up to watch the rest of Julie & Julia, and lived. The End.